Fleeting moment of excitement

I felt something soft and fuzzy in my shoe as I was trying to put it on this morning. For a moment I got excited. I thought I might have found my hamster. Unfortunately, it turned out to be a piece of bread that I'd misplaced. I'm still keeping hope.

Online Dating

Call to the Vet: I would like to help my hamster find a spouse. Can you recommend the best online dating site?

Vet's answer: Be very careful on those sites. Hamsters aren't monogamous, and they carry diseases. You also have to watch out for online predators like snakes and eagles.

I don't think my hamster likes this arctic vortex. It's scared stiff. Or frozen. We better go back inside. I should have worn gloves. Getting hart too tyyyyppp

Mav'rique

I think a good name for a hamster is "Maverick." If that's a little too western for you, you could spell it "Mav'rique."

Impostor?

Question to the Vet: My hamster was gone a while, and when it came back, it was acting a little strange. How can I tell whether my hamster is real or an impostor?

Vet Answer: If it has longer tail, rounder ears, and pointier nose, it might be mouse impostor. You can also just ask for its ID.

Chin Implants

Call to the vet: I was watching a show about chin implants the other day, and I wanted to know whether I can get them for my hamster.

Vet: Is the hamster doing it make itself happy or to please other people? That's the real question.

Ghost Hamster

This song freaks out my hamster.